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Oh wait.
Never mind.
Never mind.
If you're like me, you're probably trying to avoid all things romance today. Maybe you're single this year - by choice or perhaps you just got dumped or did the dumping. Maybe you're in a long-distance relationship (or in my case, marriage). Either way, if you're like me, you just don't want to deal with the hearts and flowers and vomit-worthy PDA that is sure to be plaguing the outside world. Like me, you might have decided to stay in and read.
So here's a list of super non-romantic (sometimes downright weird and creepy) books that are sure to keep your mind off of romance - at least for this weekend. You can thank me later ;-)
I think we can all agree that Harry Potter is the answer to most questions in the world of reading. So I'll admit that there is a tiny romance subplot happening throughout the HP series, but it's overwhelmingly NOT romance. And if you really want to steer clear, The Half-Blood Prince is the way to go for sure. The feels are strong with this one, and they aren't of the V-Day variety.
Pretty much anything by Stephen King should be safe on this day of pink and kisses. Even when the master of horror decides to insert romance into his stories, he's so blunt about it that I've definitely never felt an "awww" moment while reading any of his books.
I guess this is technically supposed to be romance, but I find it to be a guide to abusive relationships in pretty packaging. Nothing gets me raging quite like a book trying to make abuse seem romantic (and apparently succeeding). More on that here.
While there is some undeniable sexual imagery in Lord of the Flies, if you find yourself thinking of long walks on the beach or a candlelight dinner while reading this book, you might have bigger problems than being single on Valentine's Day. No really, you might want to talk to someone. Seriously, this is actually a pretty awesome book and a great choice if you're looking for a great read lacking romance!
You remember up there (^) when I mentioned the downright weird? This is it. I read Down and Out in the Magic Kingdom while looking for fictional books about Disney World. This book was just plain weird. In a good way for sure! But there are some definite anti-Valentine's sentiments inside.
For fans of YA and horror, The Merciless is definitely the right choice. This book was thoroughly creepy and there's no mention of romance, unlike most YA books that have at least a little on the side. Definitely an awesome read for those avoiding romance today!
Finally! I have found an appropriate venue to talk about March Story! This manga was the first one I ever picked up and I was totally creeped out by the end of the first page. Not only is the story awesome but it's full of pretty (and sometimes disturbing) pictures!
Finally, what is perhaps the ultimate anti-Valentine's Day book. I read this several years ago, before I met my husband. It's probably not supposed to be taken all that seriously, but it's definitely hilarious and brutally honest! I actually enjoyed this book, which is really kind of embarrassing...
All joking aside, I have no problem with Cupid's day and if my husband was home today we'd be doing all that lovey-dovey crap too. As it is though, I think I'll stay in, read a scary book, and binge horror movies with some wine and chocolate!
So what are your Valentine's Day plans?
